Trusting Yourself and Owning Your Creative Path

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Hey, Beautiful Creative!

If there’s a little voice inside of you that is whispering (or screaming) for something more, but you feel like you’re holding yourself back, this is for you!  Today we're looking at:

• Why we don’t trust ourselves
• How to stop seeking external permission
• What’s helped me reconnect with myself
• And at the end, I’ve got a big pep talk just for you, so be sure to stick around for that.

When I was a kid I really wanted to be an actress. The funny thing is, I didn't really tell anyone about it.  I auditioned for a couple plays and was so shy I was given the background roles that they give to everyone who comes. I didn't take any acting classes or even pursue it any further than those two plays way back in elementary school. I felt like I was waiting for someone to "discover me" - like the stories you hear about every so often (especially in the early 90's) where the newest famous actress was spotted at a shopping mall and offered a big break. 

As I've gotten older I've realized that nobody is going to discover me. There’s no knight in shining armor. You are the hero of your own story. If you want something, you have to reach out for it. Take that first step. That tells the universe that you’re here for it and you’re showing up for it. Make that bold statement and claim it as yours.

Why don’t we trust ourselves more?

If you experience a lot of self doubt, I want you to know that it isn’t because there’s something wrong with you. You’re not deficient.That self doubt was put there by external forces.

Societal conditioning (especially in a patriarchal society rooted in white supremacy). You have been trained to doubt yourself.

Social media trains us to seek external feedback, validation and likes. We also have access to constantly compare ourselves and our lives to others. That’s not helpful and it’s not healthy either.

Fear of failure is another big reason we hold ourselves back. If you do have a fear of failure, work to reframe your thinking around that. Things may not go as planned, but however it works out, you will have learned something that you can take with you for your next adventure.

Being a people pleaser. I’m the girl who had to have straight A’s, who can’t stand when anyone is mad at her, and god forbid someone doesn’t like me! It’s exhausting and it’s also completely unattainable and impossible to please everyone and have everyone like you.

Gentle Disclaimer: There are lots of reasons we may have people pleasing tendencies and self-doubt and I do recognize that some of those may stem from abuse and trauma, especially in childhood, or discrimination. If that applies to you and this all feels like a really big hurdle built on underlying emotional or physical trauma, I am sorry that happened to you. You are beautiful and whole and you didn’t deserve that. And I encourage you to seek professional support from a licensed and trained mental health professional if this feels like too much to work through on your own. You don’t have to do it alone.

How do we get past seeking external validation and permission?

Building trust in yourself takes time, like building muscle. It comes from repetition and consistent action. Be patient and allow yourself grace while you’re learning this skill.

The people in your life, your friends, family and coworkers will likely have opinions, advice or concerns for you if you’re starting down a new path or sharing your dreams with them. They may not understand your decisions. Some of them will be speaking from a place of love. Some of them will be speaking from a place of fear and projecting their own doubts onto you. Hear what everyone is saying, but don’t take anything to heart that doesn’t fully resonate with you and your deepest dreams and desires. Don’t let someone else’s fears stand in your way.

If you are making a big life decision that will affect other people like a spouse, partner or other family members (say you want to quit your 9-5 job and open a cupcake shop), definitely have some conversations with them about your dreams and feelings before making bold moves. 

If you’re not ready to trust yourself to make a big decision, start listening to the little things. 

Is your body quietly asking you to move it around more? Do you feel nudged to take a break and get outside and go for a walk? Listening to yourself and your needs for the small everyday things will help you build that trust muscle so you can start following your instincts and your inner guidance for bigger things.

Trusting yourself doesn’t mean that you won’t make mistakes and you won’t stumble along the way, or maybe turn the wrong direction from time to time. My grandmother loved to garden and I think of this story every time I plant bulbs. She told me that it doesn’t really matter which way you put the bulb in the ground, so don’t worry about putting it upside down. It will find its way up. You’re like that bulb. You will also find your way. 

Your path isn’t going to be a straight line. Sometimes the detours in our lives are where we find the best stuff. We learn the most from the unexpected twists, turns and bends. I love to travel and one of my favorite things to do is just wander around.  You see things you would have never seen if you had a really rigid plan of getting from place to place.  

If you’re like me and you like to plan and want to know how everything is going to happen, it can be hard to let go and trust that you’re on the right path and things will work out for you. To me, starting something new feels like walking down the stairs in the dark. You can’t see the steps, but you still have to put one foot out and start moving. What I’ve found is that the next step isn’t as far down as you think. 

Things that help me reconnect with myself:

-taking walks and not listening to anything or looking at my phone

-spending a few minutes tending my garden

-petting my animals and really looking at them

-gazing out a window and noticing something beautiful

-wandering around and taking photos

-looking at art

I know that everyone’s brains work differently, so what works for me might not work for you. My daughter has an easier time concentrating on school work if she listens to music in her headphones. I can’t hear myself think if there is background noise, but you may be someone who needs the background noise in order to really tune into yourself. Find what works best for you. 

Take a few minutes today to write down small things you can do and enjoy that help you connect with yourself. Then find some time each day, even if it’s just a few minutes here and there to do something from that list. 

Or sit quietly, take a few deep breaths, and ask yourself what is it you really want? What do you need in order to take those next steps forward? Listen and acknowledge your feelings and any fears that come up. Thank those fears for trying to protect you, but assure them that you will be okay. 

If following your creative path means that you want to start or grow your own business, if you’re looking at being self-employed or cutting back on your other work, I suggest creating a clear financial plan for yourself so you know how much money you need each month to cover all of your bills and where that money is coming from. That may not be the fun side of walking this path, but having clarity around your finances will alleviate some of the stress involved in trusting yourself and moving forward.

I’ve made a list of my favorite books relating to creativity and mindset (as well as my all time favorite novels) - check it out here!

Here comes the pep talk…

You are already whole and you have all the answers within you. You don’t need anyone else to tell you what is right for you. You already know. But you have to listen. Listen to yourself. Even if it feels scary or uncomfortable. In the core of your being, you know the right path for yourself. You know the next best step to take forward.

Listen to that little whisper inside you. Pay attention to that nudging feeling. Get curious about it. See what it has to say and where it leads you. That is your soul speaking to you. Your essence. Your internal compass.

Only you can do what you came here to do. And only you can do it in your way. You are a unique human being with your own unique mix of energy and skills, wisdom, experiences and insights. Nobody else has lived the exact life that you have lived. What you make and share with the world is unique to you. Only you can do in your unique way, beautiful creative! So believe in yourself, as I believe in you, and take a small step toward your dreams today.

Key Takeaways

• Self-doubt is not your fault—it’s shaped by societal conditioning and comparison culture.
• You are the hero of your own story. Nobody else can give you permission to follow your creative path.
• Building self-trust is like building muscle—it takes practice, patience, and grace.
• Listening to your inner nudges in small ways leads to bigger breakthroughs.
• Mistakes, detours, and stumbles are part of the journey—they help you grow.

Send me an email or a DM on Instagram and let me know your favorite way to slow down, get quiet, and listen to yourself! I’m always looking for new ideas and love getting to know you better!

Resources + Links

• Check out my go-to books for creativity and inspiration here!
• Join the FREE Creative Confidence Kickstart Challenge
• Follow along on Instagram: @heybeautifulcreative